Why does love make us act foolish?

‘Love is a euphoric complexity of emotions,

Solely used as an excuse by any individual

 Who has amania for acting foolish

Suffice it to say, this state of mind is solely by choice’

                       -Shy@ thirteen

As a teenager I fell in love with literature, the dictionary and the Arts...oh yeah! I thought I heard you ask ‘what about fashion?’ nah, there were more intriguing issues like this ‘LOVE’ thingy that most teenage boys often mentioned each time they hung around the prettiest girls in class and adults explained it away with these exact choice of words-‘who ever told you that ,wants to ruin your life young lady!’

 So...ooo ... why were hampers attached to white teddies holding foamy red hearts declaring undying love exchanged openly during valentine and hey! What was pimple face Paul, the head boy up to, when he passed a sealed scented envelope with hearts all over, to my friend Good-luck, she later told me in that airy voice of hers that she’d cherish his poems and love letters forever, I thought she looked pathetic continuously drooling over her premature plans of a fairy tale wedding and I found her search for the right  names for her children too far-fetched for her age but Tina explained it away...’awww she kinda has stars in her eyes,... indeed! When we graduated from high school it later became a usual joke to ask Good-luck, if she was drunk through school to have dated pimple faced Paul?

 Whatever it was, I found a worth-while explanation for ‘love’ back then in the pages of the popular Mill and Boons or a silhouette romance novelette and thanks to pacesetter! Can anyone remember those collections of non-fiction novels written by notable African authors? ( I remember Tina ,described them as love, kill –joys) at least they were closer to reality for reminding readers that not all romance stories ended happily ever after...lol... my favourites then were titled ‘Ebvu my love’ by Helen Aiyeohusa Ovbiagele ,’Sisi’, ‘Rich girl-Poor boy’ and lastly ‘undesirable element’ by Sule Mohammed . So finally Yours truly came up with a lasting definition of hers for this elusive thingy called ‘love’ and it was cold enough to pull the scales of my eyes, drive the boys up the wall  and earn me the name ’ice-queen’ and Iron lady when I later bagged a prefect badge.

Well back then, I thought it better to be sane than find myself acting the fool. I was tired of watching my intelligent friends go over these same motions over and over again...AKA

·         drooling over a young man, clenching on ‘he love me’ -‘he love me not’ cards

·         finding unreasonable reasons to call again, if he/she doesn’t call right back

·          Scheme to run into him or her outside offices and class rooms by designed ‘accidents’.

·         Feigning headaches so they’d get kissed or worse still a bad cold or malaria fever so they’d get him or her alone in a room with them!

·         And if you’re loads like me (as I later found out)Trying by sheer force of will and cold reasoning to  (unsuccessfully)purge yourself of your idiocy after all such a stunt like  allowing your boyfriend kiss you on the highway in the full glare of passing motorist isn’t something you’d congratulate another person for -fine! I know I can be a prude but people I am a shy person.

And while you are at it, there is  always this nagging fear behind you reminding you that you had better play it cool this time  or you’d have made a fool of yourself again – worse still for individuals (like me) who often than not apply the ‘reasonable man’s test’ to my actions all the time!

 Fact is, it’s not often possible to stop yourself doing dumb, dumber and crazy things when you’ve fallen hard for another...(lol)... the most recent symptom is chatting with the person all day to the exclusion of all others-thank God for the internet we need not day dream much. Last night a friend of mine gave me a gist about  a medical doctor’s choice of marriage  and people it was funny cause this lady’s choice of a crazy layabout as a husband is because he makes her laugh!- I could understand it for some personal reasons but he couldn’t ...lol

So people! ... People!  Against this gist as a back drop, can you give me a reasonable conclusion for why the most intelligent and smartest people act foolish when they are in love?

Hoping to hear from you,

As always

Your gist mate,

Shy

                    A NEW HEART FOR THE NEW YEAR

                                    ‘I AM THE DAUGHTER OF THE ALPHA AND OMEGA

                      WHICH MEANS I AM ABOVE STRESS, WORRIES WANTS AND NEEDS,

                                   WHERE EVER I GO ALL I NEED, ALL I WANT I GET.

                                           IT IS MY DESTINY TO TAKE OVER,

                                          I AM A CONQUEROR GENETICALLY’

                                                                                                                     -IVIE

The lights have just gone off about half an hour ago and Aunty gladys had knocked four times as was usual, when she felt they were being a nuisance but the two friends were too preoccupied in their conversation to even take notice .’ jez! Will you stop arguing you’ve always known am not a fast talker, reprimanded Jean, ‘then shut up and for once consider what I have to say, exclaimed Adobi in what she thought was a whisper. You never listen, that is the reason why I have to always go on a marathon each time we argue. Knock...knock...knock.... banged the land lady for the fifth time and then footsteps.

‘See I pleaded with you to reduce your voice earlier, Aunty Gladys is on her up stairs and I hope she is in a good mood today concluded Jean with a tiny frown, ‘were you not the one arguing unreasonably? Murmured Adana under her breath,’ Now! Young girls what on earth is the reason for that noise, you two were making? Asked Gladys immediately Adaobi opened the door, ’sorry ma, we just had some difference of opinion answered Jean from behind Adana.

‘About what,Asked Aunty Gladys taking a sit on the nearest chair available by the reading table. Not much, just trying to advice that knuckle head aunty, retorted Adaobi nodding her head in Jean’s direction but she wouldn’t listen ‘but Aunty interjected Jean her opinion is based on some dumb  superstition! ‘Which is? Asked Gladys smiling her wrinkles seemed to relax and one could catch a glimpse of the great beauty she must have been. ‘That an individual’s state of mind pre- determines the complete order of the universe and of occurrences that take place in our personal lives, some stuff about law of attraction and like attracts like, she even has a story to back this up, it utter rubbish !

‘Tell it, demanded Aunty Gladys still smiling, ‘grrrr...let the story teller tell it herself exclaimed Jean, I can’t bear to repeat the truck load of bullocks... excuse my French she murmured after one severe look from Aunty Gladys, ’K, Aunty, I will tell my story ag...ain, emphasised Adana smiling after all I am not saying this happened to someone else, this was my personal experience.

 Remember the last time I visited the U.K? The friend I visited told me a story; it was in reaction to my answer when he asked me what my opinion was about the Irish, he started thus;

There once were 2 men who decided to relocate to a new city. When they got to the city of their choice, they met a blind beggar at its gate. The first man asked the blind man; please how the people in this city behave. The blind man turned to the direction his voice was coming from and asked (sorry), how do people behave in the city you just relocated from? ’Oh they re gentle, nice and friendly people he replied. The blind man nodded and replied, you'd meet people who behave like that here then ‘thank you said the first man and dragged his suitcase to the park where he was get a bus

The second man walked up to the same blind man and asked hesitantly please what is your opinion of the people who live in this city, the blind man turned in the direction of his voice and asked how do the people behave in the city you just left ‘oh he replied am so glad I moved out of that city!, they re nasty crude, terrible people. I never thought I’d meet such horrible people in all my life.’ ohoo...exclaimed the blind beggar; you had better watch out, you're sure to meet such people that behave like that here too.

Aunty I learnt that day that I had to do away with all my negative perceptions from my heart or else I’d keep attracting the wrong people. If I remember clearly he told me life will be uncomfortable for me because my negative energy will keep attracting the wrong people. ‘And you believed that? Interrupted Jean laughing wildly, ‘yes I did Adana quickly replied.

‘Has it been working for you? Asked Aunty Gladys serenely, ‘yes Aunty in fact it worked the first night I got back to Dublin! ‘Tell me murmured Aunty Gladys expectantly   

‘On returning to Dublin, I returned to a flooded city transporting home was terrible, the buses were grounded and only the trams were working. They had put up a sign notifying passengers that if they had to get to the last stop of the journey, they'd have to stop at a station called Belgard, from which alternative arrangement will be made to get us to city west by bus. Well I boarded the tram hoping that since I was in Europe they were bound by their words, I was in for a big mistake turns out when we got to the station called Belgard, I and two men (a Asian and an Irish) waited there for more than 3 hours . Now I and the Asian had the good sense to stick together, a sign that were not expecting any help from the Irish man (I think) unlike me in the past, we even saved the Irish man the long walk to the park where he thought a bus will be waiting after hours of waiting and going back and forth the Irish man exclaimed,’fuck it! I’d just walk home and left us .About 10 minutes later to our surprise he came running back and said 'could'na jest up and leave knowing I got two friends back here thought ha-way I must such a forking arse , so whaa do you say we board the bus to tallaght-square and board a taxi I’ll pay for ya'! And that was how I got home. An Irish man I never knew and am sure would not even recognize paid 20 Euros for us to get home!

‘My point is , that is just a coincidence, cut in Jean adamantly, no my point is the law of attraction played a role there, my change of heart towards Irish people influenced his change of heart replied Adobi ,assertively.

‘I agree with you Adana, cut in Aunty Gladys quietly, you Jean should adopt a new heart for the New Year, let go of your narrow mindedness and give space to the lessons that nature and the universe teaches. Adana simply speaks of the power of positive thinking. Goodnight she concluded as she turned the lights off, closed the door, both girls could hear her receding footsteps as she headed to her room. Aunty Gladys wasn’t a woman of many words she had delivered judgement.

Your gist mate

Shy

AS WE START THE RACE IN 2013,LET US ALL DECLARE;



                                                                     I CAN! 
                                                                  I AM STRONG
                                                           I AM TALENTED AND INTELLIGENT
                                                  I AM A PRICELESS GIFT TO MY GENERATION
                                                        I AM OF A CHOSEN GENERATION
                                            A LAMP THAT SHINES FORTH AND SHOULD NOT BE HIDDEN
                                 I AM GOLD ! I SHINE FORTH IN TH FACE OF INTENSE FIRE AND ADVERSITY 
                                                                   I AM PERCULAR
                                                                         I CAN!
                                                                                      -YOUR GIST MATE
                                                                                                SHY.